Chapter 4: The Plane

So our middle seat options were mine which was an exit seat stuck between a bigger male and a European male, whom I later named "the Nodder" and "the fidgetor" respectively. Warren was stuck in a normal row between a male and a women with a child maybe that of 3 months.  

The plane ride was smooth and one would thing for a red eye and with the help of a beer or two sleeping would be no issue. Hahahahaha. I had a girl who met a guy sitting directly behind me. They talked for 3.5 of the 5 hours about her sisters wedding, about how she can't paint her nails periwinkle, but plums ok. And French tip manicure is only acceptable if it's the real nails and not fake shit...and so much more but it is way to painful to relive the terrible conversation again by telling you about it. 3.5 hours and 4 shushes from the flight attendants later...they still continued to yap. 

Now one may blame that on me for mot bringing ear plugs... But you see... I did bring ear plugs. I went to put in my left one and it was successful. I went to put in my right one and a twist to many it popped out of my hand and landed in the nodders lap. I then proceeded to try to sleep during the flight...because normally red-eyes don't have fucking yappers... However between constantly getting bumped by the fidgetor and the nodder constantly leaning his head on me... My success for sleeping straight sitting up was super unsuccessful. 

And this doesn't even begin to bring up the snorer warren had to sit by that would wake himself up from choking on his spit, chow down on snacks and head back to sleep....seriously a mini life of a ferret. 

We got to Phoenix, ate breakfast.. then almost missed our flight because they moved gates, warren fell a sleep, and I was to busy on the tablet to pay attention to time.

2 hours after that, we landed in LAS VEGAS... Only to find out Warrens bag was still in Anchorage because of the whole mishap from this morning. 

Never assume you buy a seat when you buy a plane ticket. All you buy is the guarantee of getting a pat down and being surrounded in a pool of infected hackers. 

Up next... The Dux! 

Now off to put on my face and play in Vegas.